Tag Archives: Transsexual

Laverne Cox

Laverne Cox (born May 29, 1972) is an American actress and LGBTI+ advocate. Featured as Sophia Burset in the Netflix series Orange Is the New Black, she became the first openly transgender person to be nominated for a Primetime Emmy Award in any acting category. She is the first open transsexual shown.

In 2015, Laverne Cox won a Daytime Emmy Award for the Outstanding Private Class Special as executive producer of Presents: The T Word, becoming the first openly transgender woman to win this award.

In 2017, she became the first transgender person to play a transgender character on the TV broadcast as Cameron Wirth on CBS’s Doubt series.

The ‘Orange is the New Black’ star talks to The Hollywood Reporter about nearly quitting acting and why she’s chosen to use her latest awards nod to spotlight other trans performers.

When Laverne Cox turned 40 in May 2012, she was knee-deep in debt and ready to trade in the title of “actress” for “grad student.”

After 20 years of grinding out a career as a performer in New York, Cox had a conversation with a onetime co-worker from Lucky Cheng’s Restaurant & Bar, where she was working at the time. “They had just gone to school and were about to graduate from graduate school and they were like, ‘You need to go to school,’ ” she recalled. She agreed. “When I moved to New York City in 1993, I thought I would be a superstar in two, three years tops. That didn’t quite happen.”

Though she had some film and TV credits on her resume, it felt like the time had come to close the curtain. “It was a devastating realization. It’s like, OK, you’re 40 years old. Maybe that’s all God wanted for me in this business. Maybe this is all I’m supposed to do. Now I should just listen to what the universe seems to be telling me about this acting thing and try something else. Then I got this audition. It turns out that God had a different plan.”

That blueprint included a seven-year run playing Sophia Burset on the Netflix prison series Orange is the New Black, a role that has garnered the now-47-year-old three Emmy nominations for outstanding guest actress. It’s a historic feat — Cox was the first transgender performer ever nominated for an acting award — and one, she admits, she’s still processing. “The day it happened, I cried,” Cox told The Hollywood Reporter during a recent In Studio visit. “I was in London shooting a film [Jolt with Kate Beckinsale]. I was even more surprised about this one than the other two. If this is happening now, there has to be a bigger reason.”

Cox has decided that the reason should be for her to help shift the spotlight to other transgender performers in Hollywood. “The year when a show like Pose is on the air and I honestly thought I would no longer be the only trans person nominated for an acting Emmy. No other trans actors were nominated this year, I thought, okay, this is an opportunity to lift up those performances to talk about this,” she said. “Like, invite the Television Academy members to consider the brilliant work of some of the trans actors who are working on television. Certainly, you know, an Emmy should be about the work and the talent and what you’ve brought to the craft, but, you know, in 2019, why should there just be one trans person who’s been nominated for an acting Emmy?”

Even though it is her, Cox is not content claiming all the credit. “I share this nomination with everyone in our cast, in our crew. I love all of you. Thank you, thank you, thank you for seven incredible years,” she said. “Thank you, Jenji Kohan.”

Ellen Page Has Come Out As Trans & Non-binary

Elliot Page, the Oscar-nominated star of “Juno” and Netflix’s “The Umbrella Academy,” has announced he is transgender.

Elliot, formerly known as Ellen Page, addressed his social media followers saying:

“Hi friends, I want to share with you that I am trans, my pronouns are he/they and my name is Elliot. I feel lucky to be writing this. To be here. To have arrived at this place in my life. I feel overwhelming gratitude for the incredible people who have supported me along this journey. I can’t begin to express how remarkable it feels to finally love who I am enough to pursue my authentic self. I’ve been endlessly inspired by so many in the trans community. Thank you for your courage, your generosity and ceaselessly working to make this world a more inclusive and compassionate place. I will offer whatever support I can and continue to strive for a more loving and equal society,” he wrote.

“I love that I am trans. And I love that I am queer. And the more I hold myself close and fully embrace who I am, the more I dream, the more my heart grows and the more I thrive. To all the trans people who deal with harassment, self-loathing, abuse, and the threat of violence every day: I see you, I love you, and I will do everything I can to change this world for the better,” Page continued.

Page uses both he/him and they/them pronouns, and describes himself as transgender and non-binary, meaning that his gender identity is neither man nor woman.

Support Message to Brazilian Trans Community

Father Julio Lancellotti, a Catholic priest from São Paulo in Brazil, shared a photo of trans women on his Instagram account and spoke in favor of inclusion and equality.

“The fight against discrimination and prejudice is a never-ending struggle. We are all children of God. We must always admit and never discriminate ”

Father Julio Lancellotti’s support for the Brazilian trans community is nothing new, with more than 345,000 subscribers on Instagram.

The priest is known as a strong advocate of equality in Brazil. He has spoken many times in favor of the rights and equality of the LGBTI + community.

The 72-year-old priest has worked tirelessly for the homeless throughout his career. In 2018, she made a splash on social media by sharing a video of a homeless trans woman asking for forgiveness for all the horrors the Brazilian society has experienced.

Father Julio Lancellotti was praised by his supporters for promoting love and equality for the trans community, and even appreciated for his work by the Brazilian Bar Human Rights Committee in the past.

Transgender Definition, Transgender Meaning

Transgender syndrome is a congenital medical condition treated by university hospitals around the world. It is a physical (organic) condition that takes shape in the mother’s womb. The initial sex of the offspring in all mammals is female. In the second month of development in the womb, the sex of the baby remains female or turns into a male with the hormones secreted by the fetus. During this period, the sexual structure of that tiny body and brain is determined. This explains why males also have nipples that remain as traces of the original female gender.

Something goes wrong at this stage of fetal development, and the sex of the baby’s body and the sex of the brain will not be the same, that is, the brain remains female while the body is performing sexual transformation, or while the brain is transforming, the body remains female before it transforms. Research on the brain confirms this explanation. Autopsies performed on people born transsexual have shown that the gender of the brain is not the same as the sex at birth. (Part of the brain is different in males and females.)

It is not medically possible to adjust the consciousness to the transgender body. The solution adapts the body to the brain / consciousness. This process is called gender redefinition or gender correction. The procedure takes many years (such as epilation, talking therapy, hormone therapy). Also, the financial source of this transaction must be provided. Surgery is not the last step of the procedure.

Transexuality has nothing to do with transvestism. Transvestites are men who like to look like a woman, even though they are happy and content to be men.

Transsexuality is not linked to homosexuality. A gay man gets together with a homosexual man, and a homosexual woman gets along with a homosexual woman. They are proud of their gender and oppose surgical removal of their genitals unless they encounter cancer or another disease. Homosexuality refers to a relationship. Transsexuality indicates identity anxiety, not sexual orientation. Like other people, the transgender-born person can have a relationship with a man, a woman, both, or neither.

Transsexuality is not a mental illness. Psychiatrists and psychologists saw it as an illness and tried to treat it for years. But since this is not a mental illness, it has now been understood that it is not possible to be cured by psychiatrists. In fact, it has been observed that a transgender is more balanced in terms of mental health than other people.

Clothing and appearance are not a matter of taste for transsexuals The transgender person dresses up and dresses up specifically to be seen as a natural member of the opposite sex. This is a necessary part of the treatment and the person has to live in this role for at least 1 year like a member of the opposite sex until the operation is allowed.

A transgender is not a man who wants to be a woman, or a woman who wants to be a man. Although the identity card says that he is a member of a gender, before the treatment the person is neither male nor female, he / she is transgender. Because there is a discrepancy between the gender in the brain / consciousness and the gender in the identity document.

There is no cure for the syndrome other than gender reassessment. Until the gender re-determination stage, the person is considered to be medically transsexual, but after the procedure, he is no longer a transsexual, but simply a woman or a man.

It is unpredictable to what family a transsexual can be born into. You cannot know if your child or grandchild is transgender. The majority of sufferers spend unhappy decades trying insistently to live in the gender they were born with, like everyone else. So, when these people are questioned, they may even persistently refuse to be of the opposite sex. As the years pass and mature, they begin to understand what is wrong and with great courage they can attempt to change everything radically. Because no one becomes transgender over time, you personally know whether you are transgender or not. If not, you’d be grateful for that.

Untreated, transsexuals can go mad or even commit suicide as a result of the anxiety and depression they can’t handle, because no one can suppress their existing identity for a lifetime. Before surgery, 80% of these people seriously intend to kill themselves, try or actually commit suicide. After surgery, this rate falls to the level of suicide rates in the community.

Transsexuality is not a negligible situation. Often, he may lose his family, friends, job, home, savings and reputation for the sake of this treatment. It should not be forgotten that

Nothing costs more than their lives.

These losses are the result of society’s indifference to the issue. Being born transsexual is not their choice. This is not a problem created by him.

If you change your gender by surgery, you will fall into a transgender’s pre-treatment state. No one can be forced to live in the wrong sex, even a day!.

Trans Women in Turkey

Being a transgender in Turkey means carrying a burden on your life. Unfortunately, the situation of transsexuals in our country is very bad. society is not knowledgeable. families are not knowledgeable. Transvestites and transsexuals are only shown in our society when it happens. Transvestites are shown screaming and calling on the news. In a humiliating way. (‘The guys are on the stage again!’)

When this society watches these news, they realize that this is what transsexuals are all about. The society is starting to see Tu poop as an alien creature.

Unfortunately, nowadays, there are quite a lot of transsexuals who are locked up in their homes. They were afraid to go out. The fear of harassment, the fear of insult, the fear of violence… After that evening, let him do sex work. Transsexuals were taken to the police car without question…. “I am not a sex worker” is futile in the pattern. They are taken to the police station and fined for nothing. Moreover, a non-sex worker transsexual experiences this when she leaves the house to go to the grocery store. And they don’t even ask how they will pay this fine. “If you are a sex worker, work and pay ..!” is called. By cutting this punishment; It is not known whether they realize that they are pushing these people to sex work once again… As they are not given normal jobs.

Transgender people are murdered at a young age. Even his own brother kills his brother just because he is a transgender. What is honor.! His family refuses. transsexuals are condemned to live alone. You have no love and no family. These people are not given any other chance than sex work. Why because transsexuals! The others! Even when you want to rent a house, high rent is required. “You are transsexual, you have to keep that house, you have no other choice …”

This situation is really a deeply bleeding wound for our country. However, many things can be done. If families and society are informed, situations can improve further. But unfortunately, there is no one in a high office. Nobody wants to hear or ignore the voices of transgender and homosexual people reproaching….

In public, when they see a trans woman on the street, they are greeted with sarcastic glances, harassment, swearing, and greedy looks. People stuck with a theory that they don’t have it in my family, it can’t be transsexual. But don’t transsexuals have a mother or father family? Being transgender in the family means that this family is dishonorable?

People, society, families should be told that a transsexual can also come from their families. People should be told that this is not a choice, that it is not a wannabe, transsexuals are not guilty in this case…

In our country there are millions of gays, transgenders, transsexuals, lesbians….

There is just a blind report on  transsexual murders. But when heterosexual individuals are murdered, programs are made for days, (of course, no human being deserves to be a victim of murder, even if heterosexual, (don’t be misunderstood) homosexuals should have the same rights.

Who knows? Who knows that one day your brother, sister, brother, child, will not be homosexual?

I hope that one day both transgenders can live humanely in our country.

 

Offered by Trans Azranil. 07/2013

Transgender Flag

It was designed by navy veteran Monica Helms, who declared her identity as trans in 1987.
Helms, who met Michael Page in 1999, argued that trans communities should also have a flag, and the trans flag appeared.
The idea on the flag is; The blue is designed to represent trans men, pink trans women, and the middle white to represent non-binary people
(who do not include themselves in any binary gender identity).
Apart from this flag, there are also trans flags with different colors representing individuals in the transgender community.
The transgender flag literally gained its popularity in 2013.

FTM Related Books

Here Is A List of Female to Male Related Books…

Bornstein, Kate. Gender Outlaw: On Men, Women, and the Rest of Us. Vintage Books, 1995.

Bornstein, Kate. My Gender Workbook: How to Become a Real Man, a Real Woman, the Real You, or Something Else Entirely. Routledge, 1998.

Brown, Mildred L. & Chloe Ann Rounsley. True Selves: Understanding Transsexualism-For Families, Friends, Coworkers, and Helping Professionals. Jossey-Bass Publishers, 1996.

Burke, Phyllis. Gender Shock: Exploding the Myths of Male and Female. Anchor Press, 1997.

Califia, Pat. Sex Changes: The Politics of Transgenderism. Cleis Press, 1997.

Cameron, Loren. Body Alchemy: Transsexual Portraits. Cleis Press, 1996.

Colapinto, John. As Nature Made Him: The Boy Who Was Raised As A Girl. Harper Collins, 2000.

Devor, Holly. FTM: Female-To-Male Transsexuals in Sciety. Indiana University Press, 1997.

Devor, Holly. Gender Blending: Confronting The Limits Of Duality. Indiana University, 1989.

Feinberg, Leslie. Trans Liberation: Beyond Pink or Blue. Beacon Press, 1998.

Feinberg, Leslie. Stone Butch Blues: A Novel. Firebrand Books, 1993.

Feinberg, Leslie. Transgender Warriors : Making History from Joan of Arc to Dennis Rodman. Beacon Press, 1997.

Halberstam, Judith. Female Masculinity. Duke University Press, 1998.

Hewitt, Paul. A Self-Made Man: The Diary Of A Man Born In A Woman’s Body. Headline, 1995.

Israel, Gianna E. Transgender Care: Recommended Guidelines, Practical Information, and Personal Accounts. Temple University Press, 1997.

Jones, Aphrodite. All She Wanted. Pocket Books, 1996.

Kirk, Sheila M.D. Masculinizing Hormonal Therapy for the Transgendered. Together Lifeworks, 1996.

Middlebrook, Diane Wood. Suits Me: The Double Life Of Billy Tipton. Houghton Mifflin, 1998.

Morpurgo, Michael. Joan Of Arc. Harcourt Brace, 1999 (Children’s Book)

Nataf, Zachary I. Lesbians Talk Transgender. Scarlet Press, 1996.

Nestle, Joan. The Persistent Desire: A Femme-Butch Reader. Alyson Publications, 1992.

Pratt, Minnie Bruce. S/he. Firebrand Books, 1995.

Queen, Carol and Lawrence Schimel. Pomosexuals: Challenging Assumptions About Gender and Sexuality. Cleis Press, 1997.

Ramsey, Gerald, Ph.D. Transsexuals: Candid Answers To Private Questions. The Crossing Press, 1996.

Rees, Mark Nicholas Alban. Dear Sir or Madam: The Autobiography of a Female-To-Male Transsexual. Cassell Academic: 1996.

Reit, Seymour. Behind Rebel Lines. Odyssey, 1988. ( Children’s Book about a girl who enlisted in the Union Army as a boy.)

Stringer, Joann Altman. The Transsexual’s Survival Guide: To Transition & Beyond. Creative Design Services, 1990.

Sullivan, Louis. From Female To Male: The Life Of Jack Bee Garland. Alyson Publications, 1990.

Thompson, C.J.S. Ladies Or Gentleman: Women Who Posed As Men, And Men Who Impersonated Women. Dorset Press, 1993

Valerio, Max Wolf. A Man: The Transsexual Journey of an Agent Provocateur. William Morrow & Company, 1998.

Volcano, Del LaGrace & Halberstam, Judith “Jack”. The Drag King Book. Serpent’s Tail, 1999.

Wilchins, Riki Anne. Read My Lips: Sexual Subversion and the End of Gender. Firebrand Books, 1997.

First Meeting with A Transsexual

J. B. writes:

> Having spent some time browsing the various posts in this group, I feel I’m better prepared to meet my transsexual cousin for the first time. However, I would be grateful for any advice anyone can give me. My cousin was originally male and is around 45 years old. I know he is currently undergoing hormone therapy but I don’t think he has had the surgery yet. I last saw him about three years ago and he gave no clue as to his desire to be female. His dad (my uncle) called me about 2 weeks ago with the news and I have to say I was a bit shocked. I’ve written to my cousin and he has replied with an upbeat newsy type letter. He has asked that I call him to arrange a time and place to meet up. I haven’t called yet and am rather nervous of doing so, yet determined nonetheless. I’m saddened that we haven’t kept in touch over the years (I’m male aged 34) and don’t want him to think I’m only getting in touch out of some weird curiosity.

First, your feelings are fairly typical for someone facing this issue for the first time. You can take some comfort in the probability that your cousin has encountered this before, and expects it.

Also, it is typical for many of us that no one else has a clue about how we feel or what we want, until we start coming to terms with it in ourselves. Again, your cousin will probably expect that you didn’t know; that too is normal. And shock is a fairly common first reaction. The closer you’ve been to someone, the more the shock.

You don’t mention whether your cousin is currently living as a female. In the U.S., one year of cross-living is required prior to surgery. If your cousin is now living as a female, then using her female name, and using female pronouns, would be most appropriate (and most appreciated). If your cousin is still living as a male, then ask what name and pronouns he/she would like you to use. (It’s OK to ask questions; your cousin probably expects you to ask a LOT of questions!) A time period of adjustment (for you!) to these changes is also normal.

It’s OK to be nervous, and it’s OK to be getting in touch with him/her because of this change in her life. It’s normal for family members to lose touch with each other, and to become closer when some event brings them back together again. The only thing that’s unusual in this case is the event itself! If getting together with your cousin brings up other feelings of friendship and past family events or issues, then you certainly won’t be coming across as merely “curious.”

The fact that you’ve already exchanged letters is a good start. As you call and as you meet with your cousin, I strongly suggest being open and direct and honest about your feelings, starting with being nervous. Feelings will be communicated whether you talk about them or not; it’s best to talk openly, so your cousin will know why you feel a particular way. It’s also a good way to address the issues in general; there are certain factual aspects about being a transsexual, but most of the issues that really matter are emotional. If your cousin can write an “upbeat, newsy” letter, then she’s probably ready to deal with the emotional side of talking with you.

Finally, thank you for taking the time and trouble to find out what you can before meeting your cousin, and for asking for assistance. I appreciate that you’ve done that! You’re off to a fine start as far as accepting these changes in your cousin’s life, and your attitude so far feels good and right to me. Good luck, and enjoy renewing your connections with your cousin.

firelily.com/gender/diane/first.mtg.html – 2002

Transgender Native Americans

Transgendered Native Americans are frequently referenced as nearby, non-European models of both transgenderism and homosexuality. Unfortunately a great many erroneous suppositions are circulating with regard to transgendered Native Americans, and recent explications by gay historians serve to obscure the more important elements of gender in order to make a gay political point. This article is intended to briefly correct some of the common misunderstandings, not to be a complete or definitive statement on transgendered Native Americans.

The term ‘berdache’ was formerly used by white people in reference to Native Americans born male who were living as women. The term comes from the Arabic by way of the French, it’s original meaning is ‘slave boy’ or ‘catamite’. As such it conveys European ignorance of and contempt for transgendered Native Americans, and its use is considered insulting and erroneous by Native Americans. Unfortunately, modern transgendered Native Americans are at a distinct disadvantage, as white domination has eroded traditional tolerance and respect for transgendered Native Americans, as Native Americans, under economic, political, cultural, religious, and military domination by white people, worked to shed those customs which brought ridicule and punishment upon them by the white conquerors. Kachina clowns, transgendered people, contraries, and other people the white men found bizarre were suppressed, and many modern Native Americans are largely unaware of the former acceptance and respect given them.

All parties concerned agree that ‘berdache’ should be dropped, and when possible, replaced by the appropriate term for the particular tribe under discussion. The term ‘two-spirited’, however, is enjoying a vogue in certain circles as a generic replacement for ‘berdache’. It is not by any means accepted by all transgendered Native Americans, for various reasons. Therefore this article will refer to ‘transgendered Native Americans’ as the term least likely to give offense and most likely to be understood.

Objections to the term ‘two-spirited’ illuminate many of the dilemmas and traditions facing transgendered Native Americans. First, ‘two-spirited’ is used to mean ‘queer’, that is to say, it is used to refer to gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgendered Native Americans. As such, it reflects white concepts of gender and orientation, for in traditional societies, such people were integrated into the tribe. They were not ‘two-spirited’, but true spirited, that is to say, they abided by the principle of dreaming themselves into existence, and their single minded devotion to their visions was integrated and whole, not divided and torn, as implied by the term ‘two-spirited’. In some places, the word ‘two-spirited’ is an insult applied to halfbreeds, or Indians who have ‘sold out’ and adopted white ways. As such, it defines a person who is torn from his ancestral ways, and as such, it may sometimes be an apt description of transgendered people whose tribes do not understand and accept them, but it serves only to emphasize the alienation of the transgendered person rather than to tie him to older, wiser concepts.

Other critics object to the term ‘two-spirited’ being applied to gay, lesbian, and bisexual people who are not gender variant. Transgenderism among Native tribes was very much a phenomenon of gender, not orientation. Orientation, as modern white people understand it, was not known among the tribes before the white men. Intimate relationships were dictated by one’s gender role, not one’s affectional preference–though of course there were always individuals who varied from those standards, and ways of sublimating homosexuality through socially accepted rituals. One such ritual was blood brotherhood, in which two men mingled their blood and were sworn to be always loyal to one another, to rescue one another when in danger, and to support one another in undertaking challenges. It was often observed that men loved their blood brothers more than their biological brothers or even their wives, and this was considered appropriate, normal, and manly; the homoerotic interpretation of such intense intimate relationships was not discussed.

Another important objection to the term ‘two-spirited’, is that the creation of a pseudo- Indian terms implies that transgenderism was a universal phenomenon among the tribes, when it was not. Approximately one third of North American tribes have been documented as having visible transgendered customs, which means it was far from a universal phenomenon. Further, it completely ignores Native Americans of Central and South American, about whom little is known to English-speakers, as well as non-Indian Native Americans, such as the Inuit of the Arctic and sub-Arctic regions.

It is important to clarify the arena of transgendered discussion: most, though not all, of the tribes exhibiting transgenderism were located in the Canadian and American West, especially the Plains Peoples and the Pueblo Peoples. Plains images dominate thinking about Native Americans, and it is important to understand that the following discussion does not apply to Woodland Tribes east of the Mississippi, the northern reaches of Canada and Alaska, and numerous other places.

Plains culture was extremely free, in that Plains Peoples were generally prosperous enough that very small units could support themselves, coming together in large communities only for Sundance and winter camp. Thus idiosyncrasities in individuals were much more easily tolerated as they didn’t constantly rub elbows with other people who might object. If a Plains person didn’t like his neighbor, he could always pack his tipi and leave. Pueblo Peoples, being agrarian, had much more tight knit, ritualistic, and formal organizations and traditions, as a result of which transgendered behavior was carefully channeled in socially approved ways, as compared to transgendered Plains People who were free to express themselves pretty much however they liked — within certain limits.

Without going into specific detail for each tribe, the loose procedure for detecting and raising a transgendered child was notice his or her preference for the tools and duties typical of men or women. The tribes had sharply defined gender roles, which were enforced through shame, but they did not assign gender roles based on genitals, but rather upon the temperament and occupational preferences of the child. Thus young children were labeled ‘boy’ or ‘girl’ at any early age, long before sexual orientation would manifest. At this point it is important to point out that effeminacy is not a predictor of homosexuality in men, neither is masculinity a predictor of homosexuality in women. Only a small percentage of gay men and women fit the stereotype of ‘sissy’ or ‘tomboy’. The vast majority have gender identity and appearance consonant with their genital gender. Thus one cannot assume that gender variant Native American children were also homosexual. On the contrary, most of them were probably heterosexual, and had to learn the sexual expression appropriate to their gender role. However, it is impossible to state with any positive proof what the orientation of gender variant Native American children actually was.

A child with a penis who was raised as a girl was considered a girl in all ways, and generally married a man. They were viewed as women by their tribes, and as such they were commonly the receptive partner for anal intercourse with their husbands. (Hence the French labeling them ‘berdache’ or catamites.) Plains People were polygamous, with men marrying several wives. Transgendered women were considered good wives and respected for their wisdom. Since a man generally had several genetic women as wives, he had plenty of children, and so the inability of a transgendered woman to conceive was not a problem. On the contrary, it meant that at least one wife at any given time (the transgendered wife) would not be preoccuppied with pregnancy, nursing, or the care of small children, and could be depended upon to perform necessary household chores while the mothers tended their children. For this reason transgendered wives have sometimes been construed as ‘servants’ with low status.

Grandparents and other elders also helped in the raising of the children and performance of household duties, nonetheless, while the Plains People were prosperous, there was still a lot of work to be done. High mortality rates among the men (in some cases women outnumbered men by a two to one margin), made polygamy and an extended family necessary in order to provide for the support of widows and orphans. Transgendered wives were an important element of that system. This did not leave much time for pursuing one’s personal affectional preferences, whatever they might be. Affairs did happen among the tribes, but most tales refer to young people eloping. Once saddled with the responsibilities of a family, presumably opportunities for hanky panky diminished.

Transgendered men also occurred among the tribes, but not as frequently, and are not as well documented. People born female, who preferred male activities, were raised as men and married women; they hunted, fought, and even became chiefs. While it seems apparent that their tribes were aware that a transgendered man’s genitals differed from his gender role, it was irrelevant, and apparently not used against them by hostile persons. (Until white influence made itself felt.)

Among some of the Pueblo Peoples, tests were deliberately given to young children, such as placing a child, a bow, and a weaving shuttle within a hut, and setting it on fire. Whichever item the child grabbed as it ran out of the hut determined its gender role in the tribe. Among the Plains People, dreams were very important, and people were obliged to live up to their dreams to the best of their ability. Thus if a person of any age dreamed himself as the opposite sex, he would adopt that role. Sometimes transgendered people slid back and forth between roles, assuming male name and garb for hunting and fighting, but donning female garb and name for domestic chores. This seems to have been rare. Usually transgendered people stayed in one role or the other.

White reaction to transgendered people varied. Often they did not realize that the transgendered person was in fact transgendered. Probably the most famous of Native American transgendered person was He’Hwa, a Zuni. She was a notable craftswoman, and greatly admired by her people and by white people who knew her. She visited Washington, DC, where she demonstrated Native crafts and was wildly popular. Later, when it was discovered that she had male genitalia, her white supporters continued to refer to her as a woman, and to discount the significance of her discordant genitalia, in concordance with tribal custom. Modern gay historians, on the other hand, view this as evidence of homophobia so intense that white people could not accept that He’wha was a man married to a man. However, it seems clear that contemporary white people understood and respected He’wha on the same terms as her tribe did; by contrast, modern gay authors are sufficiently ignorant of transgenderism and tribal customs that they give the greatest weight to genitals, when in fact in the cultural context genitalia were insignificant. It is not recorded if anybody asked He’wha what her sexual preference was, therefore it is impossible to impute an orientation to her, as the word ‘orientation’ is used in modern circumstances. Men in enforced male environments such as shipboard and prison engage in ‘situational homosexuality’, meaning sexual gratification with other men only because no females are available. Considering the firmness of gender roles in Pueblo culture, it is probable that a similar weight of circumstance dictated a functional orientation, as opposed to expression of affectional orientation.

Which begs the question, what is homosexuality? Is it the act of engaging in sex with a member of one’s own gender? What is the ‘own gender’ of a transgendered person? A man, woman, or another transgendered person? Or is orientation determined by desires (which might never be acted on)? ‘Orientation’ is therefore a very slippery concept, loaded with emotional weight and impossible to define in a satisfactory way. Gender role, by contrast, is much more concrete, apparent and discernible. We can say with complete confidence that He’wha was a transgendered woman, but we don’t know if sie considered herself a man in a dress engaged in a gay relationship, or a woman with a minor bodily aberration, considerately overlooked by her husband, and therefore involved in a heterosexual relationship. Transgenderism blows apart the careful dichotomy of gay and straight, as well as the sexual apartheid of man and woman.

In truth, no one is an ‘ism’, or any other form of label. Each of us is a unique being, inlfluenced by other people’s perceptions. The Native Americans of the American and Canadian West enjoyed a personal liberty and self-actualization rarely experienced by white people, and as such, even American,s who have a reputation as rugged individualists, are still not able to conceive just how individualistic ordinary Indians were. Put in a context where all people were dreaming themselves into existence, transgenderism is one of many unique ways a personality might manifest itself. The Native mandate to live up to visions and dreams seems extraordinary to people who are accustomed to dismissing dreams as irrelevant fantasies and who enforce a homogenous lifestyle while at the same time lauding personal liberty. The fundamental perplexity of mainstream American life is, “To thine ownself be true, as long as you aren’t too weird.”

That is probably why the image of the transgendered Native American has such appeal: we all wish that we were free to be who we truly are, to be respected for our unique gifts, and to not have to battle to defend our vision of self against the force of convention.

Transgendered Native Americans

Copyright 1996 by Gary Bowen

1999, amboyz.org

Transgender Parents!

Okay, let me start off by saying that no, of couse I don’t have all the answers, who does? I just have a lot of life experience as far as the children of transgendered parents are concerned.

So, let’s see, my name is Jess, I’m 17, I’ve been happily female my whole life and I don’t feel the need to change it any time soon. I live on my mother’s and stepmother’s farm. I don’t do farm stuff though; I’m a would-be suburbanite. My mom, Raven Kaldera, a FTM (female to male) and my step-mom, Bella Kaldera, a MTF (male to female) met when I was 7 and they fell madly in love, moved in with each other, blah, blah, blah.

When I was 8 my mom told me he was going to transition. He called me upstairs and said, “Jess, honey, I have something very important to tell you, I’m going to become a boy…” Now I’ll whole-heartedly admit that I’m a freak; I’ve grown up around all sorts of strange people which also includes transgendered folks. But let me tell you something, it’s completely different when it happens to someone you love; someone like your mother no less. So of couse there was a moment’s pause then I replied, “Like Bella but reversed?” He started to laugh and said, “Yeah, it’s going to be a little bit like that. I’m going to change a lot, grow a beard and my voice will deepen.”

At this point I was a little worried; would my mother still love me the same? So I asked, “Will I be able to still call you momma?” He looked thoughtful for a moment and then responded, “If that will make you feel better then you may call me mom, dad or what ever makes you feel comfortable.” That was our compromise.

I can also say that I’ve been so deeply immersed in the transgendered community since such a young age that I’ve seen almost all it has to offer. Most notably information, which is very important in this case. I’ve seen so many transgendered parents come out and say, “I can’t tell my child this, what would they think? I don’t think they’d understand my reasons for doing it, what do I tell them?” and most popular of all, “What if they hate me for it?”

Well, I’m going to stop this one right in its tracks. They won’t hate you for being transgendered nearly as much as they will hate you for lying to them, I promise you that much. If they’re spiteful enough to hate you, then they would have found something else to be wrong with you or your life-style. Also, let me tell you right now: There Is Nothing You Could Do That Would Hurt Them More Than Not Telling Them! I could never, ever stress enough the importance of telling your child something this big. They will find out, and I mean will find out. I mean, when are you going to tell them? When they’re eighteen? “Hey, sweetie, since you’re an adult now I thought it would be time to tell you daddy/mom’s little secret.”

Waiting until they’re grown up to transition isn’t necessarily the right thing to do either. Kids learn form your examples. Having them grow up watching you be miserable and depressed and hate your body is not a good example to set for them. Watching you put off the most important decision of your life won’t exactly teach them how to figure out who they are and handle hard choices about their identity.

All right. Sorry about that, but it’s really hard to imagine that when this poor kid finds out, it might not be from the parent. You can best deliver this news to them in a way that’s easy to swallow, and that can get their fears, hopes, and most importantly, their questions answered. That means the parent’s questions too, as well as the kid’s. Questions, by the way, are a really good sign your kid is accepting the change. There are no bad questions. Questions are wounderful; encourage them whenever possible, it makes the child feel reassured and loved.

If there is a question that you can’t answer, don’t sweat it; there is an entire community of people who might have the answers. So, with your child, go and find out the answers. It’s good morale and helps them feel like they’re in on it too. Also never say, “Well, I’ll find out later,” and then drag your heels. The second you do that you’ve lost not only their trust but their support.

OK, next tough question. How do you make your kid understand? Imagine me rolling my eyes over here. I really shouldn’t have to even point this out, but you can’t make him or her do anything. You should lay it out for them in simple terms. This, of course, all depends on the age. Don’t talk to your teenager like they’re five; speak to them with the respect and honesty that you would a peer, or they won’t listen and they’ll feel resentful at you for it. On the other hand, don’t talk to your five-year-old like they’re an adult. Use words that they can understand, and leave the really big words like “vaginoplasty” and “mastectomy” for a later conversation that they should be the ones to bring up. Try to stick to short 2-syllable compound words like “support-group” and “you’re always going to be my (insert cutesy catch phrase for child here) no matter how I look.” It’s very important to make this point.

There’s something else important that needs to be said. Some transgendered people, after transition, don’t want their kid to call them “Mom” or “Dad” anymore, especially not in public, because they fear that it would out them, and they may not want the reminder of their “past life”. They ask the kid to call them “Aunt Betty” or “Uncle Joe” or something else. Let’s stress this: it isn’t fair to ask a kid to call you something other than what they’ve been calling you for years. Exceptions to this rule might be: 1) if there is no other parent and the kid is excited about suddenly having a parent of the opposite sex; 2) the kid is a baby (or not born yet) and will grow up calling you by a title of your preferred gender, or 3) if the kid is an older teen or adult who feels comfortable negotiating public and private designations. If the kid is still young, don’t make them do it. Allowing them to keep calling you by your old familiar title will help them to feel like they’re not really losing a mom or dad, and help them be more comfortable with the situation. You had this child; you took on the responsibility at their birth of putting them first, before other people in your life. What do you value more, their emotional well-being or the opinions of strangers in the mall?

Now, a really hard question I’ve actually had to answer is “How will they react to this mind bending info?” Well, two possible reacttions might be: 1) They already know on some level, and most likely will have a lot of questions for you. Be sure to find some way to answer them all. Or 2) they’re completely shocked and need a little time to adjust. If this happens, don’t worry, it’s a natural way of coping. Just be calm and tell them no questions are bad, you’ll always love them and you won’t treat them differently. Keep true to your promises, especially the last one.

And as for the “They won’t understand my reasons for this big change…” thing (see me putting my hands on my hips and glowering at you), that’s not an excuse and you know it. Whether or not they “get it” largely depends on you, and how you explain it to them. (Talk to other transgendered people in your community who have already transitioned for good advice on how to explain your identity and needs to clueless others.) And if you don?t want to put in the effort to explain it to them, you’re in trouble, because if you make this change, you’ll be explaining to people and educating them for the rest of your life, so you?d better get used to it. The people who love you are the best place to start, because they actually have a vested interest in understanding and accepting. Besides, if you don?t at least try, you?re failing your kid in the process.

I think I’ve talked myself out now, and I hope this wasn?t too harsh, but like many truths it needed to be said.

Yikes! You’re A Transgendered Parent! Now What Do You Do?

2002, Jessica Brangwyn, @amboyz.org